A Healthful Reminder

It only takes five minutes out of your day to schedule a doctor appointment.

FIVE.

You probably spend more than that gossiping with coworkers.

Please take care of yourselves.

Don't put it off another day...

And put that extra Christmas cookie down! After January 1st, you'll be glad you did!

Quotable

Nikki laid back with her legs up in the stirrups, informing her doctor that she is neither sexually active or in a relationship.

Doc said (with much seriousness and sincerity):

"Oh no! You have to do something about that."

Nikki laughed--and then had the audacity to reply (with much seriousness and sincerity, like she'd just had an awakening):

"I know!"

Doc then informed his patient:

"Well...if your situation changes, give the office a call..."

Nikki drifted into her thoughts and wondered if it would ever change...

LOL!

Matter of fact--hours later--she's still wondering!

BESOS!

Come To Find Out...

I had a gynecological appointment today. It was very refreshing--I love my doctor--and it was good to know that I'm in great shape. But... I watched as my poor doctor--a really young and handsome dude, my God!--struggled with the new computer technology that's inside the examination room. He's a very thorough doctor who asks many questions, so he spent tons of time trying to transcribe every single detail into his computer. For those who don't know, I love keeping up with my health, so I see doctors very frequently. I've probably had 20 doctor visits this year, and this was the first time I saw this type of technology inside the examination room. Come to find out... Times are still changing... Hopefully this change will mean better preventive care.

~Miss Nikki Ann

2,278 Sundays To Go

My Truth

I'm trying to follow

Serendipity

and

Synchronicity.


Today those things led me to two individuals who, once I opened up, gave me exactly what I needed.

I must be willing to move the way each moment directs me to.

Spotlight: James Redfield

I've read a third book of his: The Secret of Shambhala. It only took me a few days and I could hardly put it down. I love his writing and his open ideas. His words echo through my mind as I try to stay conscious of my higher self and the higher self of those around me. Here's to the Dakini!

2,279 Sundays To Go

Just A Hello!

It's that time of year, again. And things around here are very busy and will be that way until after January 1st. I hope all is well with everyone. At this moment, I am doing some eBaying, trying to find a specific item for Sir. Wish me luck!

My Artist Space

I have received so many kind words and thoughts from you guys. I am humbled by your belief in me. Today I was rambling on and on to my mom about the next step in this "becoming a published novelist" process. It's something I've never done before, and I'm looking for as much support as I can get.

It's my feeling that the SECOND step in this process is to believe in myself. The FIRST step is to be willing to go forward with it. I believe that being willing is first, and most important, because there may be many days when I don't believe in myself. But on those days, I'll still be willing to go forward in order to see what the end will be.

As I wrote this novel, there were days I had little faith in my talents (something similiar to the "faith of a mustard seed") but I did have strength, and the will, to move forward.

Willingness first...

And then...

Belief in my talents.

Strange, but true for this situation.

Once again, I am grateful for your kind words.

Besos!

Miss Nikki Ann

Spotlight: Anika Noni Rose

Today I received many email about a person a attended high school with. This young lady is in the new Dreamgirls production. She is co-starring along with other female singers Beyonce and Idol winner, Jennifer Hudson. This woman is Anika Noni Rose (we knew her as Anika Rose). Here's a little anecdote...

There year was 1989. Me, my girl Maia (who's now in the Broadway production of The Color Purple) and some more of our friends had plans on performing an EnVogue song for our high school talent show. **Hey, LuCiana, were you supposed to perform with us?** We were freshman at the time and Miss Anika, who was a senior, had decided to do the same song. What we couldn't understand was why she'd want to perform this song solo when it was made for a group performance. In the end, her seniority won out. I can still remember how disgusted I was over it. And if I'm not mistaken, I think, in the end, she decided on doing some other song; but it was too late for us to switch back.

Hey...Miss Anika was always driven. I guess that's the reason why she is now a Tony Award winner from some Broadway play she was in. I can't hate on the woman for having drive, even if that drive caused her to run over me and my pals.

Miss Anika, my hat's off to you. Live your dream, girl. **Nikki Ann ponders a moment** Anika probably wouldn't know me if she passed me on the street. LOL! Goes to show you how silly old grudges can be. I mean, that stuff happened 17 years ago! LOL!

I'm out!

Miss Nikki Ann

My Artist Space

As of 7 a.m. this morning, I have officially finished editing my novel! Wooo! And I had to stop for a minute and savor the moment. This process has gone on for years and I didn't want to underappreciate it. When I first wrote this book, I was a childless woman. I didn't have a job and I spent an entire month just typing away, bitching about the life as a writer. Boy, if I only knew then what I know now. But life is much richer and fuller for me today. And because of everything that has transpired over the years, I believe the rewrite of my book is better than its original version, the book has grown as much as I have.

And so, right now, I pause..............Sir is upstairs running around, mom is yelling at him, Thembi's computer is humming, the heater is humming, a school bus is passing by outside...I'm in the moment. For in this moment, I realize all that my life has become and all that I still have to look forward to. And not just the things that we think are easy and good, I'm also looking forward to the more complicated and frustrated things about life.

But, for now, I have evolved into who and what I am in this moment. And right now, I am enough. And right now, I am proud of myself. A completed novel. Thank you God...

~Miss Nikki Ann

My Artist Space

Only 3 pages left to edit...

My Artist Space

Only 36 more pages to edit...

And then...

I start a new novel...

Or...

Finish one of the others I started long ago...

We'll see.

But still...

Only 36 more pages to edit.

2,280 Sundays To Go

A New Feature

I have added a link to the left of the page to Miss Nikki Ann's House: A Guide; it's a guide that gives brief descriptions on the various types of posts I do here. Nothing major or earth shattering, but, do run and tell the Pope, President and anyone else you know.

Up For Grabs

It has been confirmed that Actress Lindsay Lohan, 20, is attending Alcoholics Anonymous. I don't know if y'all know, or even care, she's been spotted getting her party on with panty-less new mother of two, Britney Spears.

Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock are divorced. Pam stated, "I'm very concerned with the press on mine and Bob's divorce. I know I have people who want to defend me or people who want to defend Bob, but my children can read -- and I'd like to resolve this amicably -- not fueling fires -- and with dignity." Um, Pammy Spammy, if you know your children can read, stop doing things that wind up in the press.

Eddie Murphy will be filming Beverly Hills Cop 4. Um, come on, Eddie! It's been reported that he did a fabulous job in Dreamgirls, why can't he leave it at that? While the first two "Beverly Hills Cop" films, released in 1984 and 1987, made more than $600 million worldwide, the third entry in 1994, made slightly more than $40 million domestically.

My Artist Space

Fifty-two more pages to edit. I can't believe I've made it this far. I've been editing my buttocks off, usually from 8 PM to about midnight. And then I wakeup and edit at 6 AM. And during the day, I spend time mentally editing (I've been working on this novel for so long that I practically know it by heart). Actually, as I'm typing this, I'm doing some mental editing, which I probably spend at least two hours doing each day. All of it together amounts to a good 7 hours a day of some form of editing. Right now, if I say the word editing one more time, I might hurt myself.

Welcome To December 2006...

Just a reminder, this is the first and last time, generally speaking, you will ever live through December 2006. Let's make this year's December memorable and enjoyable, regardless of what illusionary hardships we may be facing. Here's a great big, sickening HOORAY-HOORAH for...

DECEMBER 2006: The Best December Ever.

LOL!

Come To Find Out...

You should always go with your first instincts...

I attend block watch meetings and try to keep in contact with my local police department. I know officers by name and often stop and talk to them on the street. The other week I called my favorite officer about a suspicious looking car that was parked across the street; and he took down all the available information. Just the other day I was out front talking to Neighbor when my favorite officer pulled up. We chatted and I complimented him on the great job I saw them doing in town to stop drunk drivers and speeders over the Thanksgiving Holiday. He then informed me that they had arrested the guy I'd phoned in about the week prior--some woman phoned in that she'd spotted him smoking weed in the park and they were able to catch him in the act.

Fine.

When the officer left, Neighbor said, "I wouldn't let him know where I live." I said, "Well, I prefer he knows who I am, just in case I need some help."

Now...

Yesterday Sir and I were leaving his Godparent's house (which is around the corner). Thank God I'd driven because it was dark when we left. I looked out and saw the boys in blue searching through all the neighbor's backyards. Come to find out, someone had just robbed one of our neighbors and had tried to rob another (and these are neighbors we know).

My point? I don't sit and wait for shit to go wrong. I don't call the cops to rat folks out, I call the cops to keep my family and my neighbors safe. And as much as I love Neighbor, she is ignorant as to how important it is that the police know us and receive our help in protecting us. We live in this neighborhood and we know it best. We can be better protected by being able to supply these officers with what they need to catch criminals.

FYI: If you call the cops and make an anonymous call and they get to the so-called scene of the crime and don't see anything going down, they don't have a right to arrest anyone. You have to give your name. Withholding that information doesn't do anyone you care about any good.

Second FYI: The internet is packed with videos showing people how to pop locks--I just saw it on the news yesterday.

I'm not the baddest chick (I wanted to put the B word there), but I will not sit, afraid, in my home as some punks ruin a beautiful neighborhood. Yes, I am thankful for the work the Police Department does, but my neighborhood is as quiet, friendly and nice as it is because we work hard to keep it that way. It takes work. And sometimes you've got to put your fears aside to lookout for yourself and those you love.

Miss Nikki Ann

Dr. Oz Update

Another great show with the Doc. Again he spoke about how an optimal waistline measurement is 32.5 inches for women and 35 for men; or, you can determine your ideal waistline figure by dividing your height in half.

Example:

I'm 5 feet 5 inches

5 feet x 12 = 60 inches + 5 inches = 65 inches

65 / 2 = 32.5 inches optimal waistline measurement

Easy enough, right? I love how Dr. Oz makes information clear and easy to use. And I really love how he's not just into prescribing things, he wants what you put into your body, and how you treat it, to do the healing for you. Here's to Dr. Oz and finding out more and more about how our bodies function for us. Genius.

Man Up The Street Update

Yup, another Man Up The Street spotting, but with a twist. Yes, I have seen him on the streets, but this spotting was on TELEVISION--The People's Court, to be exact. He was on there with that girlfriend I told you all about. Actually, she's now his ex-girlfriend. And I learned way more about them than I needed to know (like how she's had a hysterectomy). Man Up The Street was claiming that when he did his last stint in prison, the ex-girlfriend was supposed to take care of his outside business. He receives disability and wanted her to pay his bills with that money. He claimed that she'd stolen over $2,000 of that money. She claimed that she did as she was told to do with it and had kept a written record of all transactions. She also claimed abuse by both the hands of Man Up The Street and his 16-year-old son (and she had police reports to prove it). He stated, "Your Honor, I didn't know we was having problem until now." Um, excuse me Man Up The Street, you've been abusing this woman and lazying around on her couch (as she called it); and you didn't think y'all were having problems. For real? Un-huh. Man Up The Street... **Nikki sighs** Okay, The People's Court is filmed in New York, so he went out of state to lose this case when he could have stayed home (away from TV Land) and lost with dignity. Now e'erybody knows his business. I knew he was on TV because Neighbor rang my phone and told me to turn the channel. I was so excited that I packed Sir up (hair uncombed and all) and went across the street to view it with them. Man Up The Street. Other information that the judge got from him was that he'd been arrested for DUI 8 times. The judge pondered as to why they kept letting him go from prison early. And after his last stint, he was released under the care of the ex-girlfriend. Now why would she let this dude come back to her place? Especially when she told the judge that after she'd had her hysterectomy, he'd threatened to kick her in her stomach. What? Maybe a month ago Man Up The Street and Sir had the kindest and most gentle moment when they'd spotted a rabbit in his mother's yard and he proceeded to show Sir its beauty. **Nikki Ann shakes her head** Anywho, Miss Nikki Ann must go. I've talked enough about Man Up The Street. Latas!

Quotable

“And if your friend does evil to you, say to him, 'I forgive you for what you did to me, but how can I forgive you for what you did to yourself?'”

-Friedrich Nietzsche

2,281 Sundays To Go

Dr. Oz...

Will be on Oprah today. He's the guy whom I got the information from about the body's four needs. I can't wait to hear what he's talking about today.

The book is coming along; it has now been edited down from 400 pages to 215 pages. And I am now editing page number 110 of 215. I'm almost there! At this point, it's about getting it done. Phew! Thanks to Kimani and Paul for keepin' it real with me; I focus on your words of wisdom as I near my deadline.

Thanksgiving was great. Shout out to my cousins, Wallace and Gia, for the invite. Sir had a great time--twice he was caught playing in the toilet.

Some funny stuff is happening to me. And I'd like to thank LuCiana and Crystal for laughing with me along the way! And, also, Paul for laughing at me.

Ang--I hope your computer issue is resolved.

Let's keep it moving y'all. Our dreams are in arms reach; we just gotta keep reaching!

Ciao!

Four Things The Body Needs...

Water

Food

Sex

Sleep


**Nikki Ann clears her throat. She's about to get personal.**

So I'm missing one of the things from that list.

Love Youz Guys!

Miss Nikki Ann

A Healthful Reminder

Fall is here and winter is coming. During the summer, it is easy to remember to drink water when your body is craving and needing it the most. But during these colder seasons, when we're not sweating as much, or, sometimes, not exerting as much energy, we have a tendency to forget to drink water. So please watch your water intake. You may not need to drink as much as you did in the summer months, but you still need a good amount to run on.

I love to drink my water hot, warm or at room temperature all year long. But winter is a great time to drink it that way, when it's so cold that drinking colder water can be a turn off.

And let's not forget our fresh, uncooked fruits and veggies, another thing that we tend to not consume lots of during colder months.

Here's to our health!

2,282 Sundays To Go

Forgot to post it!

Come To Find Out...

Sir's playgroup teacher is friends with an ex-therapist of the 22-year-old stabber. The therapist reported that the stabber is indeed mentally unstable. The therapist voiced that she knew that the stabber could be capable of harming someone. When the therapist spoke of the stabber, she to referred to her as a friend.

My point: Even those whom we judge as evil or crazy have, at one point in time, shown a side of themselves that would make someone call them a friend. The stabber is just a woman. A woman who obviously had a past that led her to her current situation and condition. Maybe she was raped or molested as a child, maybe abandoned. Maybe her parents were abusive. Whatever it was, at one point in time, this crazy woman was a whole and sane being.

My other point: If we could only help folks before situations go this far.

How to help? My belief is that we were all born with a purpose. Along with that purpose, we were given talents to help execute the tasks that we need to accomplish to fulfill our purpose. We all have a common, running theme to our reason for being here: Reconnecting to who we truly are. And we do that by using our talents to help others. By helping others, we remember who we are.

The stabber is a woman who is lost and can't find her way home. And how easy it is for any person to lose themselves--just think about your life path.

Miss Nikki Ann

What?

Okay, so, allegedly a 22-year-old woman stabbed her 3 children (2-year-old twins and a 7-month-old baby). The children are alive but remain in the hospital.

Here's my issue, her children's grandmother (the children's father's mother) stated: "They're saying that she's crazy. She's not crazy. She knows what she did and she called and told people what she did."

Um, pardon my silly insight here, but any humanbeing that can stab their children is what one might call, for lack of a more accurate word, crazy. And if she is crazy, why hadn't anyone sought her any help. Her public defender said that she has a history of mental health problems and has been a repeated victim of domestic violence. So it is clear that she has issues.

The grandmother stated: "My son never hit her, not even once. I raised him with good moral values and he would never do something like that. She is the abuser. She used to hit him and the children."

Okay, maybe she did beat on this man and their children. But, I don't know of one guy who'll sit around and just take a beating without dishing out a can of whoop-ass himself. I'm pretty sure he hit her as well. And if all these folks knew the kids were being physically abused, why hadn't they reported this ill woman? The courts and the police officers stated that they don't have any records of any abuse or calls for help to the couple's home in the past year. But there have been reports that postpartum depression may have been a factor in the alleged crime.

*Nikki sighs*

People, we have to take care of new moms. Being a new mother is a very fragile and delicate position--hormones are out of wack, can't get enough sleep, can't get enough support from a significant other...

Also, let's not assume that we know what's going on in somebody else's home (i.e. the grandmother's assumption that her son is a perfect angel).

Sometimes we're too angry to see the truth--anger/fear will never lead us there.

Let's not be so quick to judge. I often find myself understanding how people snap. All it takes is a moment to completely loose it and fall apart. I am never shocked by violence, just saddened by it. Saddened by the fact that we humans have a long path ahead of us. Sad that we're not evolving at a faster pace. Sad that women's issues (like postpartum) are still being treated as non-issues.

Try to lend a hand to a mother in need. I don't care if she's a married mom, teenage mom, single mom, mom of 3 kids... Help and understanding might have prevented this incident from happening.

Tid bit: The photos posted of this young mother are so heart wrenching. You can view the photos and more of her story at: WFSB.com. The story's title is: Mom Accused Of Stabbing Children Appears In Court.

I'm out!

Greatness

I am aware that I am great. I am aware that I am great because I was born.

Do you know how great you are?

Entertainment Update

Okay, the truth? I am looking forward to all of the news coverage of the TomKat wedding. I think Katie Holmes is a genuine sweetheart. And Tom Cruise... Ya' gotta love Tom--unless you're Brooke Shields.

If anyone finds any cool web pictures of the event, please do email them to me.

Hello!

I'm here and I haven't forgotten about you all. I do stop in, but then, the thoughts I want to write down are a little too long for the little amount of time I have to post. I'm spending each night editing my novel, and thanks to someone, I've had to set a stricter finish date; which means all my extra time is consumbed by writing. For those people I usually communicate with by phone, I'll chat with y'all when I'm done.

Anywho, lots of you have significant things happening in your lives. And I feel blessed that many of you find that I'm a great friend and confidant; hopefully it means I'm doing something right. I love hearing about your lives, and it helps to make me a more well-rounded and understanding person.

So....

Congrats to those who've had big accomplishments. And here is a burst of "GOD-GIVEN STRENGTH" for those who are struggling with some things. In the end, and after some time and hardwork, our struggles become our accomplishments.

I love y'all...and I pray that you still love me!

Miss Nikki Ann

2,283 Sundays To Go

Seventy-five, here I come!

Two Special Celebrations In One

Happy Birthday Gianetta!

AND

Happy First Anniversary to both you and Wallace!

Yesterday we ate Gia and Wallace's year-old wedding cake. Woo! It tasted just as fresh, moist and delicious as it did last year. And Sir thought it was good, too.

I wanted to post pictures, but I'm still not working from my computer.

Gerald Levert Dies at age 40

For those who are against swearing, please move on now. I am about to have a super "sista' gurl" moment...

Aw shit! Hell-to-the nawh, Gerald. Naw, Gerald...Naw!

I'm gonna miss that big, chocolate hunk of a man. I never thought he got enough recognition for his talents. Here was a man who's voice could melt like milk chocolate, but all these non-singers were at the top of the charts for making "cookie cutter" songs, with matching hooks.

Damn, Gerald!

Aunt Theldra says: Goodbye, Man!

Gerald, Gerald, Gerald.

This is as tough to handle as Marvin Gaye's death.

Woo!

My God!

"Baby I'm ready, to give you all of my love."

Sing it Gerald.

"Baby not just a little bit, I want to give you all of it."

What!

"All my kisses belong to you.....

Take my heart in your hand....

And do whatever you want to do with it baby...

My love, my love, my love, my love...

Goes deeper than the eyes can see.

I made mistakes before, but won't you please forgive me...

Baby I'm ready, to give you all of my love..."

R&B star Gerald Levert dies at 40

The singer, who was the son of O'Jays vocalist Eddie Levert, first found fame with the R&B trio LeVert, and scored a UK top 10 single with Casanova in 1987.

He also recorded as a solo artist, and worked with soul legends such as Anita Baker, Barry White and Patti LaBelle.

"Nobody was prepared for this," said LaBelle. "It's not for real to me that he is gone."
LaBelle, who said Levert was "like a son" to her, added that she hoped to perform at the singer's funeral.

Pop royalty

Levert was born in Philadelphia, and often accompanied his father on tour.

He set up his first band in 1986 with brother Sean and childhood friend Marc Gordon, naming it LeVert.

The trio were particularly successful in the US, scoring two gold albums in 1987 and 1988 before Levert left to pursue a solo career.

In 1992, he had an unexpected number one R&B hit, Baby Hold On To Me, with his father, which led to an entire album of duets, Father And Son, in 1995.

Levert also received a Grammy nomination for writing Barry White's comeback single, Practice What You Preach, in 1994.

"He was one of the greatest voices of our time, who sang with unmatched soulfulness and power," said record company Atlantic in a press statement.

"It's very sad," his friend and fellow R&B singer Will Downing told the Associated Press. "Gerald was a hard worker... He would touch the people, and that's really what it's all about."

Levert's family, including his four children, released a statement asking for privacy "at this very difficult time".

--BBC News

Sir Isom's A Big Boy Now

It's official! As of yesterday, November 10th, Sir is now One AND a Half Years Young!

There's only six more months until the big day.

Food?

Food.

Some of us (I'm one of 'em), not all, treat food as if it's gonna run out tomorrow.

Food.

So far, I've never gone hungry.

Food.

On days when I say, "There's nothing here to eat," there's usually a kitchen full of stuff.

Food.

Why do sweets have to be so delicious?

Food.

Why do restaurants serve such huge portions?

Food.

Why is fast food so addictive?

Food.

Why are these "dine-in" restaurants nothing but expensive fast food?

Food.

Why is it so hard to just skip the bread?

Food.

Why won't these restaurants pay the servers what they're worth so that folks won't have to tip?

Food.

McDonald's?

Food?

Burger King?

Food??

Wendy's?

Food???

That's not food!

Greasy diner food?

Food?

Okay, that's food!

Carrots, broccoli, avocado, eggplant, spaghetti squash, sauteed shrimp, flame broiled chicken.

Food.

Hot dog, hamburgers, greasy fries, extra mayonnaise...

Food?

Tonight I'm having fried fish, hush puppies and much more.

Whatever I'm eating, I try and eat it with a smile on my face.

Hooray for FOOD!

Buried In A Book...

My Book!

Trying to finish the editing process before I'm 75. Hey, I don't have but 2,284 Sundays to go!

So I spend my nights chopping, inserting, reading, reading and reading.

No phonecalls to friends at night.

No TV.

No late night snacking.

No kickin' it.

Just editing.

I promised I'd finish this, and dog's foot, I will.

That "dog's foot" was a "damnit", but then I changed it. Trying to tone potty-mouth down just a bit. Don't want to overdo it, though. A swear word here or there releases so much stress.

A Special Day...

For a woman who's smart, beautiful and witty.

I forgive you for making me take Sir house hunting when I felt like crap. LOL! And my ego hates to admit it, but, the carride did lift my spirits.

Happy Birthday Thembi!

A New Favorite

My list of favorite movies has always been short, nothing had been added for years:

School Daze

What Dreams May Come

Kama Sutra

Clueless

BUT...

Now I have another movie to add to my short list:

Lackawanna Blues

To me, a favorite movie is one that you watch over and over again without getting tired of it. All the movies I've listed I've seen dozens of times. And now I'm looking forward to viewing Lackawanna Blues until Hil Harper falls off the screen and into my lap.

Divine Dichotomy

I am selfish and giving...

I tell you about my life in order to heal myself.

In healing myself, I help to heal others.

In helping to heal others, they help to heal others.

Those others may be helping to heal some others.

And in this cycle, you, or one of those others, will also help to heal me.

I am selfish...

I am giving...

The Divine Dichotomy.

The Allen Chapel Episode

Rev. Greer was preaching a great sermon.

Sir scarred Mrs. Greer by stuffing an entire cookie into his tiny mouth.

After the scare, Sir played nicely up until Communion time.

During Communion, I had to chase Sir down the aisle and to the back of the church where he yelled and screamed to the top of his lungs, while rolling on the floor.

Sir's fit went on for a very long time.

Eventually, his Auntie Crystal had to take him out of church so that I could take Communion in peace.

At the close of service, a sweet West Indian woman said to me: "Just stay the course. He's so tiny, he doesn't want to sit still. But if you just stay the course, it will work out. Don't leave when he acts out... JUST STAY THE COURSE."

Sir refused to speak to me on the car ride home. I asked him not to be mad at me.

Once we neared our neighborhood, I asked: "You want to see Mother Superior and Pop Pop?" To which he replied, over and over: "Pop Pop...Pop Pop..." His speech was slow and his voice, sullen.

Upon arriving at his godparent's, Pop Pop was not there, but Mother Superior was home, cooking what looked like a fantastic Sunday dinner.

As soon as he walked into the house, he lit up.

He played with Uncle Tony and began doing his favorite thing, begging for snacks.

That's my Sir!

2,284 Sundays To Go

Where are you on your count?

Words

Sometimes we use words to consciously or unconsciously steal someone else's energy. At times I've used my timidness as a tool to gauge whether the words I am about to speak are out of fear or love. Am I saying something because I'm trying to protect myself? Am I trying to hurt the other person? The words I'm about to say, do they need to be spoken?

Words. Mere utterances of the heart.

Words. Can be used to hurt or heal.

Words. Sometimes are best left unsaid.

ACTIONS. Sometimes can speak louder than words, but it's important to know the person's truth behind their actions.

The bully who threatens a kid doesn't hate him, he's jealous of him.

A best friend who gossips about you doesn't hate you, he's jealous of you.

A boss who abuses his authority doesn't hate his workers, he's afraid they'll realize that he doesn't know anymore than they do.

Most of us aren't monsters, we're just human beings who are trying to protect ourselves by hurting others before they can hurt us, or before they realize that we're only human.

And that's just my truth for today. Hey, tomorrow may be different.

Miss Nikki Ann

Is It Lunch Time Yet?

I'm just curious as to what everyone is having for lunch; I have yet to decide. Maybe I'll steal your ideas.

More on lunch: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunch

Hello

I didn't see the girls in the park today. I'm hoping they'll come around this week.

As for Halloween, it was great. My mom was able to get Sir into his costume TWICE. First we went to playgroup and he had so much fun with his friends. When we went to leave playgroup, I thought it was a tad bit too warm outside for the hot pumpkin costume. When I tried to take it off him, he threw a fit! I couldn't believe he wanted to keep it on after everything he'd put me through. And can I say that the snacks at his playgroup were extra special on Halloween. Karen and I stood by the assorted goodies and ate EVERY piece of pastry that we could. Yummy!

Later he went trick-or-treating and afterwards he went to the Fall Harvest party at the church. And guess what? We didn't leave the party until after 8--I tell ya', Sir was a lucky little boy. Thank God I'd already given him his bath before going out, just in case something like that were to happen. His Godparents gave him a Halloween gift bag instead of candy (I sooooooo appreciated that, cause boy did he get enough at the Harvest party).

I'm tired. This morning I stirred from my sleep at 1 a.m. to go to the bathroom and couldn't fall back to sleep. I sent Paul a text message, hoping he'd be up...He was. I was happy to have someone to chat with. Then I didn't ball back to sleep until after 2, which isn't healthy for me.

Good night!

Happy Halloween

And for those who don't celebrate Halloween...

Happy Tuesday, October 31, 2006.

Holiday or no holiday, for me, living another day is reason enough to be happy.

Now I must go and FORCE Sir to put on his pumpkin costume so that he can go to playgroup and show it off. I'll let youz all know how it goes.

Latas!

Halloween

Tomorrow is the big day. Sir is supposed to be a pumpkin, but he hates his costume. Last year he fell asleep after only handing out two rounds of candy, this year I'm hoping he'll endure just a little longer. Hey, maybe I'll let him stay up 5 minutes past his 7 p.m. bedtime. Yeah right! That would be 5 minutes less of sanity for me--I don't think so.

Sir and I have been running into these two adorable little girls in the park. They look to be about 11 or 12 years old. More and more we've been chatting with each other. And let me be honest, they love Sir and entertain him while I take a moment and enjoy swinging on the swings--it's the most natural high.

Upon our last parting, the girls informed me that they'd be back this coming Wednesday to play with Sir. When I asked what they did when they weren't at the park, one commented that she does her schoolwork and watches television. Our conversation went like this:

I said, "Well, it's Friday, I know you girls must have something fun planned."

Girl #1 responded, "Yeah, I have a party to go to tonight. Actually, it's a Halloween party and I have two to go to this weekend."

Girl #1 had the sweetest smile on her face. It reminded of all the wonders of childhood. Her skinned glowed and her youthful body gave way to premature curves that would one day be the mark of her womanhood.

Girl #2 hung her head low and kicked at the ground. "Yeah, I don't know why I wasn't invited to that party."

I looked at Girl #2. She was beautiful, but her beauty was different than her friends. Something from inside her glowed. So much possibility leaped from her essence. She didn't know who she was, and even worse, it seemed she couldn't figure out why no one else knew who she was.

I looked at her some more and decided not to say anything, then I thought back to all the times we were in the park; I'd be at the opposite end, and somehow she'd always gravitate towards me...

**Hmph. Nikki Ann stops to think**

She was only seeking to be recognized. Seeking to be cared about. Looking to be loved. She wanted a friend who could really see her.

**Nikki Ann sighs**

Makes me think about many people in my life and how they gravitated toward me, or me toward them. There's an unconscious knowingness when you meet a kindred spirit. When you meet a human being and feel instantly drawn and connected to them.

I hope to see her on Wednesday. And I don't mean physically see her; I hope to truly see who she is.

Just the other day I said to Paul, "I see you." And then I finished with, "I just keep hoping that people see me."

But my true quest...

To see MYSELF.

I see all of you.

Do you see me?

Do you see yourself?

--Miss Nikki Ann

2,285 Sundays To Go

I'm In Dreamland...

I hope everyone is doing well. I didn't get a chance to post the other day, so I thought I'd do a quick drop-in to say HELLO again. Will come back soon after I've stopped dreaming... I go through these phases. And soon afterwards, I always have a breakthrough. I can't wait.

Happy Friday

Just wanted to stop by and say, HELLO! I'll try to come back later when Sir isn't yelling at me, as he's doing this instant.

2,286 Sundays To Go

In lieu of my recent anxieties and fears, I'm gonna borrow from a forwarded email that I received from Ang today. It's one that most of you have probably read; and I feel compelled to post it here. I could go on and on about the stress I've been so forcefully putting myself through, but it is more productive to contain and then dismantle my fears, than to spread it to others like wildfire.

Friends and Family

The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday mornings. Perhaps it's the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it's the unbounded joy of not having to be at work. Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable.

A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the garage with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it:

I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net. Along the way, I came across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice. You know the kind; he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business. He was telling whom-ever he was talking with something about "a thousand marbles." I was intrigued and stopped to listen to what he had to say

"Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you're busy with your job. I'm sure they pay you well but it's a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. It's too bad you missed your daughter's "dance recital" he continued. "Let me tell you something that has helped me keep my own priorities." And that's when he began to explain his theory of a "thousand marbles."

"You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years.

"Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3900, which is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now, stick with me, Tom, I'm getting to the important part.

It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail", he went on, "and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred Saturdays." "I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy. So I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round up 1000 marbles. I took them home and put them inside a large, clear plastic container right here in the shack next to my gear."

"Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away. I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life.

There is nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight."

"Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign-off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure that if I make it until next Saturday then I have been given a little extra time. And the one thing we can all use is a little more time."

"It was nice to meet you Tom, I hope you spend more time with your family, and I hope to meet you again here on the band. This is a 75 Year old Man, K9NZQ, clear and going QRT, good morning!"

You could have heard a pin drop on the band when this fellow signed off. I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to work on the antenna that morning, and then I was going to meet up with a few hams to work on the next club newsletter.

Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss. "C'mon honey, I'm taking you and the kids to breakfast" "What brought this on?" she asked with a smile. "Oh, nothing special, it's just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. And hey, can we stop at a toy store while we're out? I need to buy some marbles.

A friend sent this to me, so I to you, my friend.

And so, as one smart bear once said..."If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you." - Winnie the Pooh.

Pass this on to all of your FRIENDS, even if it means sending it to the person that sent it to you.

And if you receive this e-mail many times from many different people, it only means that you have many FRIENDS.

And if you get it but once, do not be discouraged for you will know that you have at least one good friend...And that would be ME.

After doing my own calculations, I realized that I have 2,286 Sundays left until I'm 75 (that's my rough math--math isn't my strongest point). I don't think I'll opt to do the marbles thing, but I am going to find another significant way to countdown my Sundays (I've chosen Sundays instead of Saturdays, fits my life better). I figure this will be another device to help me stay in the moment, to truly live more consciously; I'm hopeful that you will find (or have already found) your own special ways to do the same. My thoughts are with you all.

May we reach a point in our lives where our fears cease to exist, and love permeates and encompasses our being.

--Miss Nikki Ann

The Truth?

My Stress comes when I allow the world's issues to ride on my back.

There are so many different people on this earth. So many different stories that make us all who we are. No excuses need to be made...just understanding. We come into this world whole beings. And then our lives are spent trying to regain pieces of ourselves that have been chipped away by various things. And in our search to replace those missing parts, we steal from other people. We try to take their courage, fame, diginity, privacy, family, money, self-respect, peace, love, happiness... It is just as bad to steal someone's love as it is to steals someone's money--It disconnects us from ourselves. It makes us believe the untruth that we aren't whole enough by ourselves. That whole will supply what we need; if we'd only believe that we are enough, that we don't need to bring another down to build ourselves up. If we could only believe in a world where everyone is strong. If we could only strip away the lie that only the strong survive. Trust me, the weak do survive, and they could be robbing your house while you're at work. So if we all must survive and reside on this earth, why not build a better and more supportive system. A system where each person is respected for the way God created her/him. A system that utilizes each individual's talents, instead of calling one group of people talented.

I hate to hear this: "Have you seen Dick and Jane's son? He's a genius."

We are all born geniuses. Yes, all. Even those whom we mistakingly call retarded. The day the world can accept that, is the day we will live life according to the way spirit moves us.

I am a genius. And so are you.

I am enough. And so are you.

There's enough for me. And there's enough for you.

I am trying to remember the truth about my self. Would you like to do the same?

I don't hate you, I only hate me; and in hating myself, I hate you.

Because...

We are all connected. And what one does affects the other.

And that's my truth for today.

Miss Nikki Ann

Ranting and Raving

I could just go on and on today; poor Thembi had to suffer with listening to me vent. Sorry Tee Tee! Then I spoke with Tasha and I don't know if she realized how fussy and off I was. Sorry Tasha Smasha! It's one of those days when I should have gotten back into bed and started all over again. Anywho, it's 9 p.m. and I should be in bed, there's no need to make myself suffer any longer.

LOL! I'm sorry, I'm over here chuckling at myself. I'm so silly, really. **Nikki Ann pats herself on the back and tells herself it'll be okay**

That's me at the top in the Breast Cancer Awarness shirt, standing in that corporate office (notice how I don't fit well into that surrouding). It represents Miss Nikki Ann against the Corporate Structure. **Nikki Ann pumps her fist in the air** FREEDOM FROM THE MACHINE! FREEDOM FROM BIG BROTHER!

FREEDOM FROM MY OWN INSECURITIES!

LOL!

I'm going to bed, y'all!

I'm Trying To Kill Myself...

With Fear:

Fear that I won't get enough sleep. Fear that I won't have enough energy to give to Sir during the day. Fear that I won't be able to accomplish any tasks. Fear that Sir will be fussy and temperamental all day. Fear that his bad attitude will lead me to want to knock him the hell out. Fear that I'll never finish editing my book. Fear that my writing will never generate any cash flow. Fear that I'm not helping folks realize their desires. Fear that I can't hold the high vibration of love for more than a few seconds. Fear that I'll never make it a full day without feeling down. Fear that I am misunderstood. Fear that I have too much faith in my faith. Fear that to be at my optimal health would mean sacrificing things I use as crutches. Fear that if I leave the house after noon, there will be too many people on the streets for my timid personality to bear. Fear that someone will try to project their negative energies my way. Fear that I know all of these fears are fake, but that if I wake from them, I'll truly have to live.

I Fear...

Living.

And thus, unconsciously, I spend my days slowly trying to kill myself.

Slowly.

Ultimately, my fears are lies; and my blessed greatness is where my truth resides.

So God sends my Spirit to say to me: "Miss Nikki Ann, I dare You to be great."

And My reply is: "I accept the challenge."

And Spirit confirms: "Then it is already done."

It's Friday?

So, I'm trying to do three tasks at once, while Sir is napping--which only lasts a few minutes. I'm watching The Office on Tivo, doing something on the computer for my mom, and trying to type this post...A few too many things at once.

Tonight we're supposed to have high winds around 40-50 mph. I can't wait. There's nothing like a stormy, windy fall night, listening to the leaves brushing up against things outside. Today I tried to pay particular attention to be beautifal fall foliage; it's peak it approaching and I don't want to miss a thing. The other day Sir and I spotted this beautiful hot pink leaf. It was breathtaking and I had to stop and admire it, knowing that its color wouldn't last forever. *sigh*

Anywho! Shout out to Ang for selling her house and closing on a new one!

Today I approached a woman who was in JC Penney with her two children who were in a stroller. The older child was playing with a retro electronics game; it was that red, phone-ish-looking toy with numbers on it. I commented how I couldn't believe they had one and asked where she'd gotten it. She reminded me that the toy is called Melin and told me to check on line. I wanted to post it here for those who can't remember how it looks, but I'm not working on my own computer and I keep getting a block when I try to post a picture Oh well!

I justed wanted to say, hi. I'm excited to view the rest of The Office before Sir stirs from his sleep. I'll chat with youz latas.

Crap...he's up. *sigh* I guess that was about a 15 minute nap. Mom is laughing at me. I just told her: "Sometimes I can't stand him. Why can't he just get some damn sleep! Shit!" Yes, those were my exact words. Now she's laughing even more. I'm laughing too. I love my mom! I'm glad she finds humor in my stressful moments. Actually I just think she's laughing at me, remembering how it was when she was raising my brother and me.

And now that I've released that frustration, I guess I should go and get Sir...I guess. Maybe he wants to watch The Office too...

The computer won't let me use the spell check, so forgive my typos.

The Red Velvet Cloak

My computer is down in a major way; they have to reinstall windows and everything...bummer. It's gonna cost more than I have, but as usual, I'll be sent what I need to get the job done...Serendipity. And obviously God has sent me another avenue if I'm writing to you now. My birthday passed (Thanks Erica for the shout out!). I've been here 31 interesting years and it just keeps getting better...and more interesting. Thanks to everyone who called and wished me the best. Sir is healing well and is, at this very moment, harassing me about his snack. He now says the word chip--at times we believe he's saying shit. He's saying it now...LOL! What would I do without the aggravation and frustration he puts me through? I used my birthday money to indulge in my favorite thing, books!

For many years I had passed James Redfield's popular novels, The Celestine Prophecy and The Tenth Insight, on the bookshelf--too engrossed in writers like Neale Donald Walsch, Paulo Coelho, SARK, Marianne Williamson, and Julia Cameron. Last week I serendipitously noticed his books, never having intentions on actually ever reading them. My spirit danced and I knew I had to sit down and read them right there. While reading The Celestine Prophecy, a Caucasian woman wearing a red, floor-length, velvet cloak mysteriously passed by. I was intrigued, actually thrown off, but I kept on reading the book. Moments later she appeared in the aisle I was in. I looked up and admired her awesome red velvet cloak and noted to myself how her presence energized me. I wanted to spark up conversation, but my timidness didn't allow me. I returned to the book and wondered what she would have had to say if I'd actually spoken with her. In the end, I did purchase the books and read the first one in the matter of three days (a big deal for a busy mom) and am almost finished with the second book. And all along I've still wondered about the woman in the red cloak. The point? Life sets up grand opportunities for us and we turn them down over and over again.

Years ago I'd decided to consciously allow God to provide serendipity, the Universe, intuition, and coincidence to lead me. It was God's great gift to me and I enjoyed every minute of it--it took me to grand places where I met grand people and experienced grand things. Since having Sir, I've noticed that I still use these tools that God has given me, but I wasn't using them consciously or as often as I used to. James Redfield's books are helping me to re-identify with those things I'd pushed to the back of my mind. It's time for them to resurface and merge with the other wisdom that I have gained through those years. I'm timid about it all; but I'm willing, able and ready for a refreshing journey.

Thanks Mr. Redfield, your thoughtful writing gave me the extra spark I needed.

I plan on going back to the bookstore soon. And if I see the woman in the red velvet cloak, I won't hesitate to find out what she knows...maybe it'something I need to know...maybe it was just a beautiful cloak. Time will tell...It always does.

Creative Flow

I am overwhelmed with creative thoughts, almost to the point where it's frustrating; so many thoughts, so little time-- at least it seems. Years ago I'd feel odd bursts like this, but I could never figure out what they were about. Now I know that it's my inner artist wanting to get going. I keep trying to follow her and not discourage myself. It's like I'm on an artistic binge, ingesting so many things. I spend my days dreaming and toying with ideas that I try out at night. And sometimes, I find myself picking up a pen and writing an entire installment or sketching something. The other day I created two new characters and the entire story behind them. It's frustrating because this creative flow keeps me from sleeping or paying close attention to my daily tasks. Consumed. Consumed by creativity, but only having a few hours at night to put all of those thoughts into action. And right now, I've got a booming headache. My mind is way too busy for my body to keep up with and so things are just shutting down. At times I have to turn the switch on creativity and force her to rest. She doesn't know that rest is great fuel--her only goal is to create.

The Sir

Sir's surgery went well. And actually, the house is really quiet now. And ya' know, I don't know how to handle it. Mom said to me, "Ya just don't know what ta do with yourself, do ya?" NOPE! I don't know how many of you know this, but Sir has been a fussy, nosy, outgoing, social busy-body since he was conceived. Having been sick the entire pregnancy, I should have known the type of baby he'd be--a fussy, nosy, outgoing, social busy-body. When I brought him home from the hospital he REFUSED to sleep...EVER!...Unless...he was nursing. He nursed all day around the clock; and would still do the same today if I allowed it. Even now he doesn't nap (never has) and isn't excited about bedtime (he's just too pooped to put up a fight). As an infant he fussed all day; as a toddler he fusses the majority of the day. Fuss, fuss, fuss.

So you'd think I'd be overjoyed that he's still knocked out from the drugs and unable to get around because of the epidural he had today. In truth? I'm just plain confused and have no idea what to do with this free time. So here I sit. Typing.

Having been in and out of the hospital with my nephew's sickle cell anemia, I am very used to the Children's Hospital (plus Sir had been once before). But this visit was even more enlightening as a grandmother described the 9 hour surgery that her granddaughter was having on her heart. I turned to mom and said, "Wow, some of these kids are REALLY sick." And mom thoroughly understands sickness, being a cancer patient herself (having undergone Chemo, radiation and now sickening drugs that she takes everyday). But to watch the little ones suffer brings my life, and Sir's, into a great contrast and divide and I realize that...

Shit ain't that bad
(pardon that one, I needed to let that out).

So as we rode home with our fussy, nosy, outgoing busy-body, I tried to forgive all the crazy drivers and all the mean and nasty folks around us.

Shit ain't that bad.

And now, I'm trying to refocus and appreciate the wonderful and crazy life I've created for myself.

Shit ain't that bad.

And I pray that the little girl heals well and fast. I pray that her heart continues to beat on well and beyond her 90s. I pray that all of our ill babies receive the proper healthcare and treatment they deserve. And I pray that we grown folks treat our bodies with the care and respect they deserve...cause shit ain't that bad, but if we ain't careful...

... it sho can be.

Now go...

Post Secret

Interesting blog:

http://postsecret.com/

Morphing

Shut Up Already!

Tunisia sent me a email today; at the end there was a Walt Whitman quote that went like this:

"Every hour of every day is an unspeakably perfect miracle."
--Walt Whitman

And though this is true, sometimes I forget to see the miraculous perfection in it all. Nothing is coincidental. Nothing is accidental. Everything is as it should be. And yet, sometimes I create something and then forget that it was something I desired. I get lost in trying to move further and beyond my original creation. I feel stuck and miserable...That is, until I see my life in contrast to something else (like that Walt Whitman quote). In those moments I remember my truth--that I've created this life by the grace of God, and it is going according to my original wishes. And the moment I desire a change, I will BECOME the change, not just expecting the change to OVERCOME me. Until then, it would save me my sanity and a lot of energy if I'd just shut up and go with the flow of my life. Just shut up already. Shut up before I talk myself into an anxiety attack. Shut up before I take my life for granted. Shut up before I say something I don't really feel or embody.

Shuttin' up can be a miracle in itself.

Broken

Image From "Thembi & Preston: What Love Looks Like"

Dancing at the reception
Notice the groom's endearing gaze. Wow! A woman receiving such a gaze from a man is a blessing to behold...breathtaking. This moment will help her to remember why she still loves him after he's gotten on her last nerve! LOL!
FYI: The bride did wear two gowns that night. How divine!

Image From "Thembi & Preston: What Love Looks Like"

The bride and groom at the rehearsal dinner.

Image From "Thembi & Preston: What Love Looks Like"

The bride and groom at the rehearsal dinner with the flower girl and ring bearer.

A Sigh of Relief

Crystal, Tunisia, E.Craig & Ang--It was good to hear from you all. And E.Craig, I appreciate you taking the time out of your busy schedule to read my blog. I stopped by yours today, your latest post is very touching--congrats to you and your family for their accomplishments.

And me? Just watching Isom press his non-toxic crayons into the apple he stole from the kitchen (he can now reach high up enough to get to the fruit bowl). I guess I'm happy he's a healthful eater, but I'm not overly fond of his newly discovered mobility. And those crayons? Well, at least their non-toxic! It could be worse. Hey, a lot of things could be worse.

Ang, I didn't call you because my best friend, LuCiana, popped in late last night and stayed until about 1 a.m. And boy did we need each other's company (she and her hubby have 4 kids at home). She wanted to be listened to (the kids at her two pieces of pizza--it sent her soaring) and I wanted to vent about my jadedness. Yes, I'm tired from being up so late, but at least I don't feel as jaded--but still jaded enough.

Now I must go and collect all of the gnawed-on crayons.

Recently I've been feeling...

Enough About Me

How are you guys? What's everyone been up to? Hit that comment link and leave me a little something.

Omacine Buckeye & My Neat-O! Moment

For those following Omacine's journey, there's a new post:
Omacine Buckeye

I had a few minutes and I checked my site meter to see how many hits the blogs are receiving and so forth. I was excited to see that folks are coming from all over to read it: The Philippines, Belgium, Austria, Chile, Switzerland, Germany, Samoa (What up!!!!!!!), Sweden, United Kingdom, Hong Kong & Ireland (a beautiful country I'd like to visit one day). I was also excited to find that if you do a Google search for Nikki Ann, my name blog will turn up on the first page of results. Neat-O! And if you search for Miss Nikki Ann, my blog is the first entry.

After a long day with Sir, something this trivial really excites me. I've gotta get a life.

Slacking Off

A sista is supposed to be doing an internet search to find cute toddler slippers for Sir...Not! Instead I'm sipping on caffeinated coffee (a treat for me since it gives me the jitters and I can't drink it often) and going into a creative zone. Lots and lots of wonderful thoughts are flying through my mind. I love this time. A time when writer's block is non-existent and I feel in love with myself. I try and ride the flow of these moments, not knowing when my low self-esteem will allow me to tap into this moment again; it really is about when one allows themselves to tap into these moments, they're always available, just waiting.

Monday, Sir and I ventured out to the reservoir to take a 3 mile walk with the other mommies from Deb's playgroup. I arrived at 10:07 thinking that we were supposed to start at 10:00. When I didn't see anyone, I frantically grabbed Sir and the stroller; and began running, along the way asking folks if they'd seen any women with babies go past them. And of course LOTS of women with babies go walking there, so that questions was worthless. As I ran I tried to take in the sites of the beautiful waters and foliage, but it was just too dang hard--that stroller wasn't an easy thing to push with a 23 lb. baby lounging in it (plus other items that we just HAD to bring! Right!). About a mile into my run, I ran into one of our old pals from Sir's gym. We chatted for about 10 minutes and that put me even further behind in catching up with the girls. After our chat I started a crazy sprint, sprinting for about half a mile uphill until I couldn't bear it anymore, while passing a couple, who looked like lesbian lovers, who were wowed by my speed. As I slowed and walked, I passed a dad and his toddler, enjoying a slow walk as the toddler was curious about EVERY single rock and piece of dirt they passed.

Next I passed an elderly couple and asked if they'd seen the women. The couple's English skills were poor and we didn't quite make a connection. I then asked If I should stay to the left or the right of the path and the old man said: "You have come really far! Keep left." And so I did, running like a maniac.

Once I passed them I decided it was time to run again. I kept wondering to myself, hell, they must be running because I should have caught up with them by now. I ran and ran until I passed two more women with a baby. Once I got about 2 minutes ahead of them I came to a place where I didn't know whether to go left or right. I turned back and ran towards the women and apologized for having "mommy brain." They chuckled and agreed that mommy brain sucks, and then informed me that I, indeed, should be heading towards the left. They then commented on my brilliant running speed and I explained to them that I'd been running like a fool to catch up with some folks I'd decided I'd never catch up to.

I then jetted ahead of them and thought about a pep talk Oprah once said she'd had with herself about letting go. I agreed that it was time for me to let go and let the situation be what it was going to be. Running like a fool wasn't going to do much, and I'd only miss the beautiful sites (I was now almost at the end of the 3 mile trail). I slowed down, handed Sir some snacks and tried to savor the moment. Seconds later, and I do mean seconds, I saw Deb and the others headed towards me. I was to find out that we were supposed to arrive at 10:30, not 10:00; and hat I had indeed just met them at the beginning of their walk. I wound up having to walk that same 3 miles again, going back the way I started, and passing some of the same folks again--the two ladies I passed chuckled at me when they saw me again.

Along the way, I told the girls of the revelation I had about letting go and needing to slow down. And I said, "You know, Deb, reading is fundamental. If I'd just slowed down to fully read the email you'd sent out, I wouldn't have had to run an extra 3 miles." But, in the end, I'm glad we did meet them and walk the extra 3 miles--along the way we ran into two snakes (one was dead), and it was the first time I'd seen snakes that close up. And these brave moms toyed with the live snake so that the babies could watch it slither away. How neat! Actually, I backed away for that part.

So yes, it's time to slow down. Time to stop treating life as a race. If not? I'll miss out on the great scenery and wind up having to run more miles than necessary--and that ain't right!

FYI--It's Wednesday and I'm still in pain from that 6 miles on Monday.

Image From "Thembi & Preston: What Love Looks Like"

Photo courtesy of Bonnie

Image From "Thembi & Preston: What Love Looks Like"

For my readers who don't know, that's me with the short haircut!
Yes, I had to point that out because I now have devoted readers who aren't friends or family members of mine!

Images From "Thembi & Preston: What Love Looks Like"

So many folks took so many great pics from the wedding and emailed them to me. These photos are courtesy of Tunisia's camera. This is my first time posting anything from the wedding because the event was so huge that I couldn't figure out a way to tackle it. I've decided to post blurbs and pics from time to time. I think it'll be more breathtaking that way than just doing one BIG album where you can't savor each picture. And as I'm now having the time to take a look back at these photos, I am, again, amazed at how handsome of a couple they make. Let us all pray that their love surpasses their youthful beauty (and I know that they hope they can keep both their good looks and their love! LOL).

FYI (for those who don't know)--The wedding was June 17, 2006. It was my brother and sister-in-law's grand day.

Love

Our Announcement

Sorry Ladies. It's official. Mr. Bear asked me to go steady with him last night. And even though he'd had a few rounds of drinks, I'm pretty sure it was sincere. Ahh, mi amor, mi pan dulce.

Fun Alcohol Facts

The human body produces its own supply of alcohol naturally on a continuous basis, 24 hours a day, seven days a week?

The world's oldest recipe is for beer?

Vikings used the skulls of their enemies as drinking vessels.

The early church declared that alcohol was an inherently good gift of God to be used and enjoyed...to despise alcohol was heresy.

During prohibition, temperance activist hired a scholar to rewrite the bible by removing all references to alcohol beverage.

While there wasn't any cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, or pumpkin pie to eat at the first Thanksgiving, there was beer, brandy, gin, and wine to drink.

Anyone under the age of 21 who takes out household trash containing even a single empty alcohol beverage container can be charged with illegal possession of alcohol in Missouri.

The above information was obtained from: http://www2.potsdam.edu/hansondj/FunFacts/index.html

*Nikki clears her throat* And for those hitting the booze too hard, I have no idea where you can purchase that book to the left.

And for you ladies who are looking to hangout with Mr. Boozin' It Up Bear, I'll see what I can do to get his info--that is if he can focus long enough to give me his digits. He's such a sloppy drunk and we fight about it all the time.

LOL

Latas!

Omacine Buckeye Subscription

Omacine Buckeye now has her very own email subscription. Go to her blog to subscribe:

Omcaine Buckeye

Omacine Buckeye

The story continues...

For Those Who Weren't Able to View the Mothers & Sons Slideshow

Blah!

Let's face it, some days are just like, BLAH. I sit wondering what day of the week it is. I rarely know what day of the week it is! And then something refreshing happens: I stop and stare into Isom's eyes or I get a rib-tickling phonecall from Ang or my mom says something that's too cute and funny or I just LOOK at Peanut and Thembi and laugh or... Yeah, then I realize that life is about these tiny moments. Moments that, once linked together, equal a lifetime. A lifetime of small, intimate moments. Things that most folks won't even know happened in my life; they won't be written about in the newspaper or spoken about at a water cooler. My precious moments.

Speaking of precious moments...

Obviously it was late at night, and I knew I'd smelt something burning. I went outside to find Peanut burning stuff in the backyard. It just didn't seem right--so I had to grab my camera. I looked at him like he was crazy--which he really is. Actually, burning stuff is something my dad and my Uncle Robert Earl do (the southern men they are). It's so sad to see Peanut turning into dad. I bet he never thought it would happen.

And for those who can't view the slide show, here are the pics of the infamous moment.

Shout Outs!

Just wanted to say hi...

LuCiana
Crystal
Tunisia
Melissa
Selima
Preston
Thembi
Kimani
Audrey
Gia
Wallace
Erika
Jaden
Erica
A.P. Manque
Ang
Deb
Zoey
Wayne
Subrina
Tonya
Keyla
Takisha
Paul
Kirk
Turkessa
Tasha
Kenny
Mishari
Rev. Dion
Robin
Tangy
Uncle Wayne
Aunt Marion
Chiwanda
E. Craig Crawford
Ava
Mr. Tony G! -- Mom said, "Go to work!"

Phew!
And that's the short list!
I am so thankful for all of the support you all give me. The fact that you come and read about my average, everyday life means so much. Without you I'd just be talking to myself--which I do waaaaaay too much of throughout the day already! Like I'm talking to Sir now, but it's clear that I'm really just talking to myself cause he's still doing what I told him not to do.

Deb, Ang, Erica, and Tasha, what are we gonna do with these kids?

Con Besos y Amor

Omacine's Update

Omacine Buckeye has been updated with a new layout and a new post. Drop-in today and see what she's up to! Feel free to leave Omacine, or me, a comment; or get into some dialogue about the crazy things going on in her life. Again I present to you...

Omacine Buckeye

Omacine Buckeye

I'd like to introduce you all to a character of mine: Omacine Buckeye. Omacine was born Tuesday, September 19, 2006 at 2:30 AM when my mind couldn't rest. I was having hot flash after hot flash and felt miserable. Out of my misery bore this interesting name--Omacine Buckeye. I sat in bed and chuckled at the name, hoping not to awaken anyone in the house. This is a very normal process for me when creating my characters. I'll be up at night, or even during the day, and a name flashes into my mind. I always feel the need to explore that name and create a storyline around it. This time was no exception. I immediately started creating stories for Omacine Buckeye and was so tickled with the process that I decided to pen it.

For those interested in taking the journey with Omacine, we'll view her life through many different avenues. The first installation is in the form of a journal entry. Please be kind and thoughtful when reading Omacine Buckeye's stories. A busy mom, I have NO time to edit her stories (as I use my free time to edit my novel). I am carving out a small portion of my writing time to update her story, so you will be viewing this raw and unedited. This is about the story and not about the grammar; so don't email me with corrections!! LOL! As usual, feel free to pass this along.

And so I present to you...

Omacine Buckeye

Mothers and Sons

The story is the same...

No matter what race...

No matter what economic background...

No matter what religion...

No matter how crazy we women claim our sons to be...

No matter what grocery store...

No matter what playground...

No matter what prejudices...

No matter what year...

No matter what age...

The Love of a mother for her Child...

Tis the same EVERYWHERE...

From the cradle...

To the grave.

Please note: The slide show contains about 14 photos. It may seem like a lot more because of how slow they are moving. If you have the time, please view them all. I chose them because I thought they were so powerful and spoke without words. You'll know the slide show is over once you've seen Sir and I twice! LOL