Shockingly Surviving The Ledge

I woke feeling feeling sick and in need of loads of meds to calm the symptoms.  I got up to powder my nose and find the meds I so needed.  I passed Shock (our Robo Dwarf hamster, looks like a cotton ball/bunny rabbit) and decided to chat with her, she loves to chat--she's skittish as hell, but loves to chat.  I opened her cage so that she could sniff my hand and know it was me.  We chatted and then she did the thing that I didn't need at 3 AM, she jumped out of the cage.  Good thing I am calm with pets (not scaring them off like Sir does with his eagerness to hold and love on the fury, adorable creatures), because her cage his up high, away from any safe spots to land.  But I did some thinking and after about 3 minutes managed to entice her with a detachable part (which doubles as a traveling case) of her cage.  I know that Nasty Nancy (Nasty Nan or Nan) senses when there is a ledge and instinctively knows not to jump or walk off.  But Nan is a Chinese Dwarf and has a different innate sensibility, while Shock's kind are so skittish (even if they are calm and friendly) that they "skit" to their own demise (plus, what dumb ass would open the cage while it's on a high countertop, void of any safety nets under it?)--MissNikkiAnn raises her hand.

So Shock is alive and it is now 3:30 AM.  I will probably be pushing meds through the syringe until about 4:00 AM.  With this "free time" on my hands, I will be playing Kingdom Rush on my Chromebook.  I have completed the levels, but am now trying to get 3 stars for each of them.

That is all.

Chronic Pain

I don't mind (anymore) that I NEVER have a pain-free day.  Hell, I don't even remember what that feels like.  My normal pain-level day is 3 and up (10 being dying (literally).  I was forced to come up with a scale after being asked a million times at the E.R.

My pain is up and rising.  I go to bed at a 5 (already medicated) and wake-up at a 7, which my meds will hopefully bring down to a 5.

The pain is all-consuming.  And my favorite high-level pain remedy is backordered (yup, med companies sometimes provide one sector with too many of a product, leaving pharmacies out on a limb. 
And I feel for my pharmacist every time he has to tell me that one of my pain meds is backordered, since he knows that I only request certain pain meds when my regular medicinal pain regime is not keeping up with the pain.  He sees the begging-for-relief in my eyes.  Just two days ago I was lying on his floor (yes, on the pharmacy floor).  My body had momentarily given up functioning properly (well, MY Dysautonomic "properly"). 

So I wait.  And wait some more. Trying not to lose my mind.  If it rises anymore, I will have to contact my doctor.  and for those not acquainted with the prescription-pain-relief phobia in America, be grateful, cause it probably means that you and yours are physically well and healthy.
Big Corporation and Big Government, please stop your paranoia.  Statistics show that only a small number of patients abuse/misuse/overuse their narcotic pain meds.  I am not on a narcotic pain med (which would be the best so that I wouldn't have to take FIVE non-narcotic (but strong!) pain meds instead of ONE! narcotic.

One of my favorite lines that an advisor spoke to Queen Elizabeth I during a difficult decision-making time for the Queen:

"A prince should be careful to not be afraid of his own shadow."

Dysautonomic Relief

I access my own port (putting the needle into my chest) and administer my own IV meds (which are way better and faster acting than oral meds, which is why drug addicts are willing to poke needles into their arms and other body parts).  I've got the IV pole and everything else that comes with the privilege of performing your own infusions (I even take it with me in the car if I need to leave the house). 

Did I mention that my walker (with a seat) is my best and constant companion?

Dysautonomic Behavior

It's how I roll.  And I work overtime.  No vacation days.  No holidays off.  I'm on the dysfunctional Dysautonomic grind.  All day.  Ev'ry day.  Catch up!